Hi Dnester, I'm sorry you are going through this right now. I know it's hard. Sometimes knowing the diagnosis is much worse than not knowing. But knowing the diagnosis can give you a sort of power that you can use to get better. I'm sorry that you are feeling like you need to SH. That's tough. I do that too so I know what that is like. I hope you can stay safe, but if not, I hope you don't do too much. Can you get an additional appointment from your T this week or an emergency phone call since you feel like you are spiraling? Gentle Hugs Kit