partially agree. being a 20 year old, i can tell you, im not a child. i still learn things and grow - but everyone does. 60 year olds are still growing as people (hopefully). but i have been through a lot and was forced to grow up early. whereas my boyfriend is turning 24 this year right after i turn 21. he still has TONS of growing up to de because his parents babied him for 21 years. so the number doesnt really matter.

as for the money issue and mental support - its hard to help someone who doesnt help themselves. and it seems weird, but sometimes the best thing is to just let them fall on their faces but let her know that if she needs you, youll be there. even though you say youll cut off all ties, i bet that if she really needed you, youd still be there.

bottom line - you do not deserve to be treated that way. if she feels you have done all that stuff to her and you honestly havent then its in her own perceptions. i really hope something works out because you dont want to lose your daughter but you dont want to abused by her either. im so sorry youre going through this right now.