Hi,

I do know, and the answer is yes you do deserve to live and be happy, captaineo. And I can completely empathize with your heartbreak as well - it's a very downheartening, depressing feeling, a great longing in the heart from what I recall. But I don't have children so I can't relate to that side of your struggle so much - but of course I know it's obviously difficult for you.

Hang in there captaineo, what you're experiencing has been shared by others as well, believe it or not, and if you can just keep moving forward getting through each day at a time, I guarantee you one day you'll wake up going about your day and suddenly realize 'wow, I'm through.'

I find logging onto this site and relating to other peoples struggles very helpful as well.

Sending you support of spirit, captaineo.