This shed a lot of light on it. I have spent so long confused. At the beginning I was absolutely convinced the whole breakup was my fault. That if I only opened up when he told me too, If I only trusted him enough to be emotionally vulnerable that things would be different. I beat myself up for long over it. But I knew there must have been a reason I felt so much resentment. He told me he didn’t want to marry the first woman he fell for, like his father did, and have it not work out. I tried to give him reasonable ultimatums and try to make the relationship work but he just kept coming to up with more excuses to why were weren’t right for each other, most of them being I didn’t do this or that. He wanted me to send him a nude because we had not seen each other in a couple months and I told him I wasn’t quite comfortable doing that. His exact words were “other guys girlfriends send them nudes. I’d think we’d be far enough in our relationship for that to be acceptable”. Not when it’s something I’m uncomfortable with? yeah. But somehow I loved him so much that it still affects me and I’m still trying to move on from it. He’s had 2 girlfriends since and I haven’t had anyone. I know I need to just get myself out there and let it go. I’ll try my best to.