I don't know that it's the telling per se -- it's the owning of those feelings yourself that is probably the important thing. But it needs to happen in a relationship first? That the T can accept you and those feelings? Talking about them in person, then, may help but I'm not sure that email will -- except if that's the best way you can broach the topic, if those feelings are too difficult to discuss in person?

What happened to those parts when you loved others in your life at an earlier age? What you wrote about the adult self in particular stikes a chord in me, too, like something I was missing and never got and was important for being a full, healthy, participating adult.

Given that he has focused so much on you being an adult, seems like that could be a particularly interesting one to discuss with him? And to have him accept you, and that feeling? If he can -- or, if he can't, accept that about him and move on?