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To share or not to share that is the question. What would be the purpose to share this with him. How can it help me to share it with him? I understand why I feel all those things. It is because of what I did not get at critical stages of childhood. I do not even understand what I think will happen by telling him. I could actually be worse off, deeply wounded, if he does not respond well.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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