Quote:
Originally Posted by Sisabel
I’ve been trying to find a counselor in my area but so far no luck. My insurance coverage for counseling is not very good. I haven’t had good experiences with counseling in the past but I think I should at least try again.
I am really feeling sad. Not sure if I have sunk into a depression or it’s just sadness.
I should probably stay off Facebook. All weekend I kept looking at pictures of happy families... friends getting together...
I have neither.
Hubby is my best friend. We are both estranged from family... history of abuse... we had similar upbringings... we can understand and be supportive of each other. I’m very fortunate that way. But hubby won’t socialize at all. He doesn’t want friendships or a social life and I feel isolated.
I go out a lot on my own to try and meet people and make friends. I don’t have any close friends though. Not really. I always find myself being available to lean on for others but when I need somebody to lean on, they are busy.
I have pulled back from people. I listen to their stories. I try to say nice things. I say very little about myself anymore. When I do share anything about myself, I instantly feel regret. I feel like I am setting myself up for more judgment and more relationship failures when I open up even a little bit to anyone.
Do you ever feel like just giving up and accepting things as they are? Is that giving up or is it acceptance?
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I am similar at this point in my life. My H, and I are getting along better now, but he keeps him self busy with projects around the house, so he don't have to deal with any thing else. We don't socialize. My alcoholic brother lives with us, and it is difficult to deal with him daily. I also have a lot of history of being abused for most of my life. My H grew up in a very disfunctional family, and he drank a lot, but has quit now, so we do get along better now. I have had so much trouble last year with T's, and P Doc's that I have been weening my self off the meds, and I am quitting the P Doc's. I am not sure yet if I will keep the T I have. I also am at the point of just letting everything go. At this point I don't know if this is good, or bad for me. I guess only time will tell. Right now I feel as though I am just here, not living, just here. If that makes any sense to you? I have even had a hard time being on here bc I have been so negative for awhile. I am sorry you are having such a hard time, and I do understand.
