As usual, Mickey has said it all better than I do with regard to the decision. I won't rehash that, and I know you're going to talk it over with your T.
I just wanted to support you on this:
Quote:
Originally Posted by KnitChick
So my issue I've realized, is also a vulnerability. I get hijacked by insecure emotions during group. If I share, it's stupid and everyone knows it. If I don't share, I'm a chicken and everyone knows it. I don't know how to protect myself from that and its deep rooted.
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Aw, I feel like that a lot.
It's highly doubtful that the other people who are also in DBT group are going to think those things given their own difficulties. A fear isn't stupid because it's different that what someone else is afraid of (everyone's afraid of something). Showing up and failing to talk about stuff most people would never admit to in front of others is certainly not chicken. Seriously, how many people without mental health issues would risk opening up like that to people they don't really know? Not bloody many.
I know it's deeply rooted. My social anxiety and poor self-esteem scream this at me all the time. I've had that conversation with my T. "I know this stuff isn't reasonable. The rational part of my mind agrees with everything we discussed. It just never *feels* right deep down." All I can suggest is to have your fore-brain keep reminding yourself of the more reasonable interpretation. Keep noticing and reminding yourself of times when people do show otherwise ... and how that feels. Until hopefully it starts to gradually feel a little better.
I have AvPD and I'm almost 50. It will never feel great. But then probably nobody every truly does. I'd be happy to have it manageable.
Hope this helps a little, even if just to know you're not alone in this.
If not ... um ...
Yea! KnitChick is awesome!
