Thanks, I understand and have a sense that you feel this deeply yet won't and don't need to say how much. I get that sense, which helps.


The reason it helps is not even simply personal. I'm in a situation that again could be seen badly, pathologically, but the situation is more than just a "me" situation, even more than a simple "me too" situation.


The people involved here are relatively highly placed and well-regarded. To open this up would have an impact way beyond my own personal circumstances, which as an activist, feminist, and once considering the field of therapy and the other fields that my partner is in, those would all go into what the one friend I do have now says puts me in the unique position of advocacy.


I have tried to focus on survival and still have to, but this man is a seasoned therapist and lawyer who also has lots of social justice issues and callings. I get he sees in me and my situation something that he wishes he could do but can't. That is is the place for a disabled and abused female to speak out. I get too that he might be pushing an agenda, possibly one I am not ready for now or ever.

Still that voice of speaking out against injustice beyond my own personal life strikes me as meaningful and potentially helpful to others plus empowering to me.


My partner is too old and progressed in dementia to actually be helped I think though I can try. He strangled me so treatment would at least allow me to be near him when he died.

Very sad. But on the other hand when I was working in any place many said, wow, you have a sense of what is wrong and what to do, you should write or say something.

So maybe the strangest thing is that this is how that calling I have not taken now may be the only way out and one that like I know how the caged bird sings gives others a voice who may be silenced.