Quote:
Originally Posted by Nowinners
I wonder if you are just more emotional about your family than this sister is? Perhaps she got the impression that you didn't want to talk anymore or that talking right now just isn't working? You once said that one of your sister's mostly cut emotional ties with the family. I did that when I was younger because the relationship with my mom was more painful than happy. My mom was so much a part of my brother and sister's lives that it felt easy to move far away. Were your daily phone calls truly intimate? Or was she a bit detached all along? Does she really know that you want a relationship again? If she knows--I wouldn't bother until a lot more time has passed.
You are saying opposite things here.  |
If I called and acted like nothing ever happened, this sister would most likely also act like nothing ever happened. I’m not going to do that.
I came on here years ago, struggling with my husband and mother. Also, I had a toxic friend, who has since eliminated herself this year. She flamed out over nothing and never called me again, too, nor I her.
I’d say how I have a good relationship with my two sisters. Ironically, now I am still with my husband and we are improving because my husband is finally communicating and making effort with me. My mother is being kept at a very delicate balance of me calling her every few days to see how she is, because that is really ALL she wants and I want to maintain minimal contact and not be estranged.
My sisters spat some mean things at me during this fallout. One thing was this sister S said, “We sure aren’t ever going to listen to anything anymore about your marriage!” Anything they had against me, they threw in my face. Is that love? I did not do anything like that to them.
What a tragic snowball! I was hysterical and depressed over the dysfunctional marriage. I had a close relationship speaking to my mom and sisters often. I am so sorry I ever confided in them. I am so sorry I ever picked up the phone and let them into my life while I was experiencing (and still am) a dysfunctional relationship that caused me the depression it did/does. They threw in my face my stuff they ‘had on me’ just to hurt me. People do this intentionally to hurt you when they are angry at you over whatever, they use your faults against you, even vilify you.