Jan 29, 2019 at 03:59 PM
....to relax I am reading articles on attachment to therapist on Quora and thinking about my therapist and being in his office.
I should be doing normal adult things. Maybe watching TV or reading articles other than therapy. What the HELL!
I hate this I hate this. I do not want to stop therapy because of my attachment. I cut out sessions and stopped emailing him on purpose to help calm that part of me but a particular hard sessions on Monday caused me to send him an email to reflect on what triggered a freeze/dissociation event. Now I spent all day looking at my email to see if he would respond to it in some way. Like just to say what a good job at having insight to the situation or something. Why do I even need him to reply? Why? I know he wont reply and will just discuss it on Friday. Hearing his voice and or getting a reply from him is like being tucked into bed and that is so wrong.
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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