Wow, what an awful situation piggy momma. Yes, thoroughly depressing.

Despite the dynamics [or lack thereof] between your mom and her husband maybe you really should just stop being part of your moms deceits piggy momma? I mean, if she wants to secretly squirrel away money, okay that's her thing, but I honestly think you'll start feeling better within yourself if you detach from being part of the dishonesty - enabling. I know my conscience wouldn't let me be happy in such a situation. It would gnaw away at my already depressive state of mind.

But hang in there piggy momma, please. Things may change for the better. You'll find a way through. (((Hugs)))