It is very important that you get your son evaluated by a mental health professional who specializes with children ASAP. Especially since it is gotten to the point where you are seriously considering giving him away. Don't give him away - don't give up on him. Stop trying to use the internet to diagnose him and get him to a professional who can provide a full evaluation.
A full evaluation will determine IQ, learning difficulties, reading delays, ADD/HD. Or - will at least rule those issues out.
My son was almost 4 years old when we had him evaluated. We learned that he had Sensory Integration Dysfunction, slow processing speed, fantastic verbal abilities, Dyslexia. Finding out that his behavior and issues resulted in how his brain was wired helped so much towards understanding him and most importantly, learning how to advocate for his needs. My son is in Middleschool now and is doing great. Getting him the help he needed was crucial.
Sacrafice whatever you need to in order to pay for an initial evaluation - it will be the best use of your resources ever. I am certain of it. You MUST put your son first before anything else. Your college degree will mean nothing if your son is lost. A child depends upon his/her parents for care and nurturing. You will have to step to the plate and parent.
I realize that thinking about changing how you relate to your child seems impossible but trust me - change can happen and it usually isn't as tough as you may think. You sound exhaused and not sure what to do. I think that once you get your child evaluated THEN you will know what steps may or may not need to be taken. You are worrying about therapy and changing your routine when you don't even know what is up with your son.
That is why getting an evaluation is a must. This will provide you with a starting point and a road map. You can take it from there. Start with your son's Pediatrician. Or check your university's Health Services for access to behavioral health services. Get a referral.
Get your son evaluated - so that you know what you are dealing with.