I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, tmg4me Yes, it can be hard to deal with certain things if you're struggling with MI. But it's not your fault this is happening. You didn't ask for it. I think it means that you are a VERY strong person - even though it's hard, you're still fighting and doing your best! Be proud of yourself for that. Please don't give up. You've got this. I'm glad your pets are helping at least. I hope you'll be able to find the right meds combination for you. Keep trying! I know that things seems pretty bad right now, but trust me when I say that they can get better. Just keep doing your best to cope with it, like you're already doing. We're here for you if you need it. We'll listen to what you have to say. We care about you. Keep writing here if it helps. We'll always be here to support you. I'm here for you as well. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Sending many hugs to you