I'm so sorry you're struggling, despondent18 I have never experienced this, so unfortunately I don't have a lot of advice to give. I'd suggest to talk to your Pdoc about this and see how it goes from there, if you haven't already. Maybe he/she will be able to help you. Hopefully you'll be able to find the right meds combination for you. All the others have great advice as well! I hope you'll feel better soon. Sleep is definitely important, but it's hard if you suffer from MI. Do you know what usually causes the "bad nights"? What about the "good nights"? Is there anything you're doing differently between the two? I'd suggest to think about that if you haven't already. Perhaps it doesn't depend on you, but it doesn't hurt to try. I hope you'll be able to get the help you need. You can do this! You're strong, I know that. I believe in you. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to vent here as much as you want. We'll listen to what you have to say and won't judge you. Keep writing here if it helps. I'm here for you as well. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this