My book is published and is on sale now. I also created a companion website and am working on adding content to it. It's a great deal of work and the costs are adding up. It's ok though.

There's still no motivation though. I'm doing all this work based on checklists that I created and follow. I miss that "automatic motivation" where I did things just because I wanted to do them and followed through to the very end.

Now it's hard to get a project off the ground even if it's just cleaning my space. These checklists help because I can get stuff done but it's not really coming from me in terms of motivation to just do something, if that makes sense.

I have been thinking a lot about why I feel so alone even though I live with my family. I think being alone is fundamental to the human condition. I think it's something that I have to get used to although I wish it didn't have to be that way. I often think I'll end up being alone and that's causing me to miss out on what's happening right now. It's really strange.

My mood is low but I guess I'm managing.