Quote:
Originally Posted by ArtleyWilkins
I feel safe in relationships when I don't have fear. I don't fear being mistreated. I don't fear being manipulated for that other person's evil gain. I don't fear unfair judgment from that other person.
Safe relationships don't have to be perfect. The other person doesn't have to be flawless. They simply have to treat me with respect, approach me honestly and openly about their own needs and desires that might affect me, and keep judgments about me based on truth, communicating those concerns to me directly and fairly.
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So well said....I would add that in a safe relationship, I can be as open as I want and need to be at any time -- I am not forced to share and on the other hand, when I begin to share, I don't get shut down.
I have had to examine a lot of my relationships lately, and since therapy ended for me about 8 months ago, I have been taking stock of a lot of relationships and finding that they are kind of crummy and some of them aren't even all that safe. But the situations where I DO feel safe are more and more precious to me. At minimum, I believe therapy should feel safe or what are we even doing there?
(like Artley said, that doesn't mean perfect)