I feel safe in relationships when I don't have fear. I don't fear being mistreated. I don't fear being manipulated for that other person's evil gain. I don't fear unfair judgment from that other person.

Safe relationships don't have to be perfect. The other person doesn't have to be flawless. They simply have to treat me with respect, approach me honestly and openly about their own needs and desires that might affect me, and keep judgments about me based on truth, communicating those concerns to me directly and fairly.

In therapy, I did feel safety. My therapists were always respectful, honest, straight-forward, and open. They explained to me what we were doing, why they were approaching me and my needs the way they were so it wasn't a mystery -- I knew what our mutual goals were, even when those goals shifted. There was always mutual dialogue and communication. They spoke honestly with me about areas of concern and possible improvement, helping me decide if I needed to make changes, and if so, they helped come up with a plan for how I might do that if I needed that assistance.