For me clinical therapy "love" was degrading and toxic. Also pointless.

I think it's self-evident that the basic scenario of one-sided feelings, or at least one-sided disclosure of feelings, is a set up for bad things to happen. It puts the client in a dangerous place and then encourages them to keep coming back to "work thru" the feelings. So much for first-do-no-harm. This is rationalized on the basis that some unknown number of people find it helpful. Lot of horror stories leak out on client forums and therapist blogs, but the denial reflex is strong.