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Old Feb 06, 2019, 04:05 PM
Anonymous52333
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Quote:
Originally Posted by justbreathe1994 View Post
I am posting this here because normally I’d tell my DBT T but she is gone this week. I am trying to work on my skills, so I guess I would appreciate if people didn’t comment saying that ex T was cruel or that I’m a stalker for driving by her house... I understand everyone may have their own opinions and I respect them, but those comments are pretty triggering for me and I’m still in a vulnerable place since she left.

I saw ex T walk by in the hall at the clinic and she looked at me briefly, but didn’t give much of a smile. I know I didn’t smile at her either. She just gave a soft “Hi.” And walked right on forward. This reminded me of times when she’s work to sustain eye contact and I tried doing that with her, but she looked away. Probably because she’s not my T anymore.

This may seem like a small thing to be triggered by and I know I’ve posted threads like this before, so I’m sorry for taking up space on here. I am trying to tell myself maybe it’s hard for her to see me there too. Maybe she misses me. Idk. I definitely don’t want to assume the best, if it is indeed, the worst - that she doesn’t care and she’s not happy to see me. Or even, maybe she’s totally neutral. I guess I wish it didn’t have to hurt. I wish we could both be happy to see each other, because I mistake hurt for negative feelings.

I don’t know whether it hurts her to see me (definitely not assuming it would hurt her as much as it does me) or whether she doesn’t care about me anymore. I mistake the two, but I’m trying really hard to believe it’s just hard for her too and I know that’s probably incredibly selfish of me to want that.
As I understand it, they are going to follow your lead if they see you outside therapy unexpectedly so that they do not brake your confidentiality. Maybe she wasn't sure if you were comfortable with her acting like she knew you and being friendly. Do you think this fits?