Hi Wander, hope you are doing a little better now. I dont know your whole history but read some of your recent posts. I have been on locked wards a lot recently and I am so against it when it happens. It is always the police or ambulance in the worst case taking me to the hospital. I am a very big danger to myself at that point though and it really is for the best. After I come out of the episode(manic followed by depression) I am thankful that I was there in a place that was uncomfortable but safe.

We are formed here in Canada too, 72hrs for assessment and then they decide if you have to stay longer. It sounds like your drs are more relaxed about you having freedom which I would think would make your stay shorter which would help too. Here they have you locked up a lot sooner than what you are describing.

If you are already having trouble with past experiences please do not run, it will only make things worse. Being picked up by and running from the police so many times now some of it is very traumatic and in my experience is way worse than voluntarily going to a locked ward if you can convince yourself to make that decision.

Please take care of yourself