I read your story.
Are you in med school?
Do you have a therapist?
Are you still struggling with bulimia?
Perhaps your mother is a support person to you?
Do you have any siblings?
What is your job? Do you have acquaintances there? any females that you could socialize with?
I feel very sorry for you.
Both of these men are dangerous and I feel that you need to do everything in your power to get them out of your life.
Get restraining orders on them. You can quit the drugs, I believe you are stronger than you think.
keep posting we are listening.

I am giving you a virtual hug because you sound like you could use one.
(((((((((HUG)))))))))
bizi