Welcome to Psych Central! Have you told him how you feel--that you feel more like a roommate? And what you need from him to feel loved? If he tries to change/do what you want, then that says he cares and wants you. Otherwise, I suggest you think about seeing a counselor, since you are distressed with how things are going and as you say, maybe work on self esteem. (I'm sorry if I say something that suggests I'm clueless. I'm just not up to reading everybody's comments on your thread and your responses.)

I've been married almost 30 years, and yes, in some ways, my husband and I are more like roommates. But we're both in our sixties. He does things for me, tells me he loves me, listens to me, and we do most everything together. And I know he would never be unfaithful. I'm hoping for at least 20 more years together.

I see lots of folks have asked you questions for you to consider if deciding if you want to leave him. Know that we care and wish the best for you, Alwaysme0.