He's being a selfish and spoiled, immature child if you ask me. First off anyone with common sense knows that going on a holiday/vacation while unemployed is quite irresponsible and likely unaffordable. You don't know how long it will be before you find a job why would you waste money on leisure if you're not sure where your bread and butter is coming from and for how long that will be? That's just wisdom. That's the first problem. he's calling you out as being selfish, when really his tantrums are the epitome of selfishness. He wants what he wants regardless of your needs, your wishes, your ideas.. heck anything it seems that you come up with and is not willing to compromise.

I say move on. Now that the proverbial honeymoon is over for you as a couple, his true colors are showing. He wants to pretend that he can ignore your situation of being unemployed and they just won't exist. Sort of a magical thinking type of situation here. He lives in a delusion that if he doesn't acknowledge it, maybe it will go away.

Everything he is doing now that you won't give in, is a manipulation which begs the question, how long has he been directing (put nicely) your life and your behavior? Because I have a hard time believing his controlling and manipulating ways have just cropped up now. Maybe you're just seeing it for what it is now?

Personally in your position, just say no. From a responsibility point of view, no to the vacation, you don't have the freedom with no job, very little money, and considering you're separate now, it's all on you now. Say no. NO islands, no compromise, you have better things to work on right now even if it's not a job tomorrow.

Sounds like you've been entwined with him so long that you didn't realize just how much freedom he took from you along the way.

Walk..away.. And welcome your new independence and freedom with open arms! find yourself, find your way, and the a guy that will treat you with respect and honor and support you will come along in good time.