Snow,
You've taken a break but now you feel like maybe you ended therapy too soon. It sounds like you ended with your last T on good terms and left the door open to return, which is good. My question is have you seen anyone else or was your last T your first experience with therapy?

If it was your first experience with therapy you may want to consider trying some new first. This would give you a comparison. Since you've already stop therapy this would be a perfect time to try someone new. If the new T doesn't workout you can always start back up with your old one. By trying someone new you can then have some answer for the question--Would I be doing better if I was working with someone else?

As for how long did it take me to figure out if my T was the right one to work with or not? I've been going for 8 months and it has only been the last 3 that I've decided that she is someone I can work with. I still do not feel comfortable talking about many issues but that is just who I am. My T has seemed to be OK with who I am from the beginning. It just took me 5 month to figure that out. I still question our interactions at times, I don't think that will ever change.

When I get in the mode where I am questioning if my T is right for me, I usually rewind the therapy tapes (mental tapes not real tapes :-) )and look closely for evidence of a bad connection. I tend to get paranoid about stupid crap, so I ask myself, has my T done anything that demonstrates she is not trustworthy, is judgmental, dismissive, deliberately hurtful? When I do this exercise I usually realize that she has gone out of her way to avoid any of these actions. In my case when I do this session analysis I find many subtle things that she has done that provide evidence that she IS trustworthy, she is NOT judgmental, dismissive, or intentionally hurtful.

If you are questioning if you T is right for you, you have given yourself the room to try someone new. Otherwise you can take a close look at your interactions with your current T and see if she is or isn't meeting your needs.