Thank you for sharing such a detailed response! I have always been uncertain about my BP diagnosis because usually my mood swings only last a few days max, but more often they last an hour or a couple hours. However, when I was on just antidepressants my symptoms were much worse and only improved once I added a mood stabilizer, so, the jury is still out...

I will try the cold water trick - it's funny, because when I have panic attacks I always jump in a freezing cold shower instinctually, but just putting your face in is much more practical when in public lol. I've gotten a LOT better controlling the urge to self-harm. One thing I do is tell myself that I'm allowed to do it in an hour if I feel the need...and usually when the time comes the urge is diminished enough so that I'm able to resist it. That's something I borrowed from cognitive behavioral therapy to deal with OCD stuff.

Anyways, I'm just sort of rambling but thank you again for your thoughts!