I've been there. My advice is to focus on one step at a time. Set yourself small goals and pat yourself on the back for accomplishing them.

After a hospital stay I couldnt even get out of bed. My first goal was literally to get from the bed to the couch. I only showered once every 2 weeks. It took time, but I was able to climb out.

Definitely look into meds, therapy or alternative treatments that may suit you. I know that my SAD lamp has been huge for depression. Final thought: keep talking. Talk as much as you want and we will listen. You got this.