Idk if any relate but last night and a touch of this morning I just had no hopeful thoughts...like "this" will always be a struggle no matter what.... where will this story end? Nothing better or worse than now?
I try to remind myself I don't know the future but yet, it's difficult to realize today's actions help mold tomorrow in ways.

Idk why I share this,...

guess I argue with myself a lot. ... little flame of hope please come back for those that it's smulders out...
Though with me, in a few hours or days I maybe a sunshine... or not.. I never understand my cycles that well... April I hope to paint again

For.now music and try to find something.. at times I have "happiness " then wonder if it's real or a lie..