History also shows that this pdoc is really good at helping you and you had the bad pdoc for at least some of those long episodes in the past and he just threw meds at you and hoped something would stick with no logic.

Have you done IOP before? I live too far away to be able to do it but everyone says it really helps a lot. 20 days is a long time so maybe don't think so far out.

You've done this before and you'll get through it again. I know you feel horrible right now but this will end and there is no reason to think that it will ruin everything for you. Your mom is probably being overly optimistic but that is what moms are for.

You are doing everything right. Just give it some time.