I'm so sorry you're going through all of this, raging vortex I agree with AlwaysChanging2 and amandalouise. Perhaps it's just an alter that you've had since the beginning. I'd suggest to talk to your doctor about this and see how it goes from there. Hopefully he/she will be able to help you. I'm so sorry, I know it's hard. Please don't give up. Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. I'm so sorry you have to deal with this