nightdream,
I wish for the day when none of us have to 'pretend' and we can just be. I also wish for a reprieve from this unrelenting darkness that is hounding you. This disease is the worst!!
I wish you felt safe. I wish you had a good place to hide.
I wish you didn't have to pretend and could just be how you are and have that be good enough for everyone around.
If I were there I'd build you a fort in your living room to hide in. I'm an accomplished fort builder both metaphorically and sofa cushion and sheet wise!