I'm struggling today. I think the neurofeedback is making me more depressed. Bad headache after training last night, though thankfully that's gone now.

Mostly, I think I'm frustrated that there's no one in real life that I can really talk to about things that feel bad...

I should be able to tell my NF guy things like:


I should be able to talk to my therapist about things like this weird "state" I get in (withdrawn, don't really want to talk to people, far away and dreamy) - but I can't. Because last time I went in feeling like this, very withdrawn, she freaked out, and it sucked. So, I'm about to head out to T and no clue what I'm going to talk about.

It's all just stupid. Life feels kind of stupid and pointless, and I don't feel like I can say that to the two people who probably most need to hear it.