Hopefully being here on PC can help you to feel you aren't completely alone...  Here's a link to an article, from PC's archives, that talks about what to do when you're ashamed of your anxiety:
When You're Deeply Ashamed of Your Anxiety
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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