Quote:
Originally Posted by Doglover6335
He makes lots of comments about me being forgetful and mindless when I do little things like forget to turn the fan off when we leave the house and things like that. He doesn’t see it as being mean; he says I should be happy that he’s truthful with me.
An example is right before we got married I was dieting to make sure I would fit in my wedding dress (I’m small; under 125 but there was no room to gain anything in this dress) and he said randomly one night “Are you sure you’re gonna fit in your dress?” And i said yeah I’ve been dieting and he said “well it looks like you’ve been gaining weight so i doubt it.” Of course this launched me into a freakiut session cause I’m insecure. I was crying and shaking and so unhappy cause I just wanted him to think I was beautiful. He got SO angry at me for getting so upset at him for being “truthful” and ignored me for days. He threatened not to marry me but eventually said he’ll do it “only because I dont wanna disappoint my family” he apologized a few days later but it still hurts to think about.
|
It sounds to me like he is putting you down. Pointing out what you're doing "wrong", not supporting you and also making you feel insecure about possible weight gain.
The loving response would be to joke with you about being forgetful, but in a very loving and affectionate way, and to remind you of how beautiful you are at any weight.
His threats are concerning. It seems to me he threatens you when he wants to gain control over YOU and your reactions.
I agree with the above that this is all very concerning. And again, this sounds like emotional abuse to me the more you tell us.