From what you have shared Doglover, you are an emotionally insecure person and your new husband is an emotionally unavailable person. If that movie you described showed a scenario where a man was sleeping with a woman that was not his wife and he was enjoying some kind of "involvement" with her even though he is married, and your husband doesn't see anything wrong with that, he is infact showing his emotional unavailablity.

I am willing to bet you are actually a very attractive female, petite and appealing, but you can't see that about yourself. I have noticed this most definitely can happen where a very attractive female genuinely doesn't "feel" adaquate and can be much more sensitive than she should be. Unfortunately, this is what makes her attract the WRONG kind of man which is typically a man that is "emotionally unavailable". That can make the woman begin to feel even worse about herself in that this kind of man NEVER allows her to develop "healthy" self esteem. The reason for this Doglover is a woman with healthy self esteem would NEVER put up with how he behaves. Truth is that if you had a good job and could easily provide for yourself, you would say to him, "Ok, you leave, don't let the door hit you in the back on your way out". Also, you would not put up with his comment about your dieting and fitting into your dress so you look nice.

I think you should sit down and write out a list of all the times he said things to you that hurt you. It will probably slowly put the pieces together that show him as an emotionally insensitive person which is CLEARLY unhealthy for you in that he will not contribute anything to your developing healthier self esteem. And that is what he just told you when he walked out that door and threatened you. He is saying, "I simply CANNOT be emotionally available to you". Perhaps you need to actually HEAR that.