I am going through this now myself. I think you have to find activities and friendships that make you happy in your life whether you have a significant other or not.
I am very introverted and also isolate to some degree to prevent associating with the wrong people from triggering my disorder. Well, I recently did that and let the wrong person in, handled things inappropriately from my end, he shut things down, and it hurts like hell. We just weren’t a match, but I still wanted it because I was so infatuated by some of his traits. But I am now trying to think more with my head, and less with my hormones, and go more slowly.
Years ago I made a list of everything I wanted in a relationship and I found the person who has been a great father to my son and lasting friend for 40 years. Things weren’t good enough to prevnt a divorce (I divorced him) but bipolar is very complicated and I would now only want someone who truly understands bipolar. I marvel at how supportive some of the partners of some people on this forum are. If you keep putting yourself out there, hold on to what you want and don’t settle, boost your self esteem by making friends and pursuing your music and your teaching, I think things well get easier.
We care about you. Keep posting.