To answer all of your questions—

I sought help because of severe anger. I regularly beat up my parents. Punched and kicked my dad, whacked him upside the head with my mom’s tax book, threw a phone at his head, destroyed two of my laptops, destroyed 3 phones (by throwing and stomping on them), kicked a hole in a wall, kicked a hole through my bedroom door, punched people in school, swore at everybody, etc.. It all started when I was 12ish, but didn’t peak until I was 14. Then it kept going and going.

I find that Ritalin helps me focus and get work done, hence I like it. I just get distracted for unknown reasons (my fault, really, as I have no discipline) and think too much about various things all at once.

I stopped my rexulti as of last night and have no plans of taking it again.

And no, I do not have anybody IRL who can keep an eye on me, as I live by myself and don’t date anyone. (Not interested in dating atm either.)

You’re right that maybe my T notes are missing important details, but she said nothing stood out to her and I know she knows me well. She said she just saw lots of anxiety in her notes, but who doesn’t have anxiety? That means nothing.