(((Kimmy)))) how tough a spot you feel you are in!

Please remember that you speak for your part... not all of you... that MAYbe there IS a part of you that CAN handle what you cannot. I think that trying to hang on to "staying" in control, and not allowing yourself to dissociate, is making things tougher for you. Have you tried to let go, relax some, stand back, zone out (choose your favorite term!) and perhaps the part of you that is able, will come forward and help you? (Assuming you wish to co-exist with the other part... if not, then let go completely.)

What you are dealing with is pretty "normal" for DID I think. And depending upon where you are in your therapy, will depend upon how you might best handle this stress. If you are overwhelmed, though, you might wish to step back a bit, and don't push yourself. This stage is always difficult, trying to blend back together and understand the abilities and limitations, wants, needs and preferences of each part of you.

Others, singletons, probably only see and remember how "you" did this in the past, or how effecient you are, not realizing that the part of you being frustrated and trying to say, "No" is not the part that might actually enjoy an activity.

Does this post help at all? One of the reasons for DID is that point when you "knew" you couldn't do THIS anymore. Since you feel that way again, rather than create a new adult that CAN do what you are facing... try accessing a part that wishes to ...or at least try....

(((Kimmy))))