I want to purge what I'm experiencing. But I'm not always sure how to articulate properly. It's life issues, mainly relationship issues, as well as some trepidation about going back to work, how I'm doing sober, my experiences being more positive, ugh. Well it's all kinds of stuff and I get derailed. A lot has to do with the man in my life. Right now I don't know if he's my boyfriend or roommate. It's complicated and messy and not healthy at all. I'm posting here of all places because my primary diagnosis is Bipolar 1 with psychosis and I lurked a long time before posting, then lost internet and disappeared, and now I'm back. I'm glad I'm back. This site helps immensely. Mostly I want to hash out my thoughts and have no desire for another flesh and blood therapist. I didn't like the last couple and don't wanna risk that again. Ugh. I mostly have to post when he is sleeping or working cause he gets weird and paranoid and makes me feel very anxious and like I am doing something wrong seeking help or validation for myself or feelings and thoughts..