Quote:
Originally Posted by Moose72
Please read.
Two days ago, my 21 year old told me that he's transgender. Im having a difficult time dealing with this. Not because Im against transgender specifically- I have trans friends- but because I feel like Im losing him. Like he was diagnosed with cancer and only given a few months to live.
I have a letter he wrote me in 4th grade telling me why he loves me- he signed it. Im grateful that I have a lot of photos of him throughout his life. I am tryi g to make this NOT about me but I cant help it. Im in total shock. I fear something bad will happen to him - people dont always accept transgender people. That's putting it lightly.
I can't wrap my head around this. Its a huge loss. Of course I know that he will still be my child no matter what but I dont know this new person. He has known forever. Everyone in the family (that know so far) is in shock. My mom doent know what to think. As I said I have a friend who is transgender - but Ive only known her as a woman and she's not my child. She is however a great resource.
Nobody can take our relationship away. But I really fear for his well-being and safety. He's only 21.
All for now. Im still stunned, sad, overwhelmed, happy for him, angry... All the stages of grief rolled into one.
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You said you're happy for him (Is that the right pronoun to use? I'll go with it.) so I'm not telling you anything new, but I want to emphasize the importance of focusing on this stage as a step forward toward complete health.
I do understand the fear of mistreatment. I think every parent does to some extent, but my wife and I are friends and supporters of the local university's GSA (Gay Student Alliance). We have heard tales of how hard it is to be outside society's idea of gender normalcy. We have also heard of the value of allies and shed tears of joy to know that those students can still succeed despite the challenges and differences from society at large. This gives you a chance to be even more valuable to him as he continues on the path of life. ... I'm happy, too, that he felt safe enough to come out to you.