I'm feeling better???
I still want to hurt myself but I have energy and showered yesterday and went for a walk today and even had a nice short chat with a police officer looking for a dog. I have a feeling if I encounter anyone I don't like it's going to throw me off the cliff again though and I'm going to start yelling because I'm still irritable just nothing has annoyed me yet.
Sending hugs to all

Edit: wow, that didn't last long. I threw a chair and yelled so much at no one my throat hurts now. Scratched my arm again too just out of anger. I was productive though, threw some wood in the basement so not all bad?