jmo it seems you have real issues with authority ( " daddy issues ... your pdoc " ) ... for me coming to terms with just what effects me too much and adjusting my daily schedule to avoid it and luckly I have xanex that really helped me to get a handle on things ... almost never need use it anymore but it was a godsend to get over the hump ... I also have a distraction I go to when it gets too much ... I have been lucky to have reached a level that I can mantain ... though some days I really don't know how ...

I am tired all the time ... including days off ...

I wish you the best and peace in your life ... Tigger ..