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He says it is an emotional flashback but we talk about it as the child part that I have seen living in a dark basement room, disheveled and covered in tar. When it takes me over I am in dire straights. Suicidal, self harm, depressed, desperate. I never realized it was a part. Anyway when I go into session he makes me go check in on it. See if perhaps it needs something like coloring books or food or asks me to clean it up, give the room a bed. When I link up with it in my head I feel the heaviness, the pressure behind the eyes, floaty all that. When I do what he says and and do these nurturing things it actually helps calm things down.
I don’t know what to make of all this. To me I just think it is the nurturing and connection I receive from T that actually makes me feel better.
Is this really PTSD or is it a dissociated part and part of DID?
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When a child’s emotional needs are not met and a child is repeatedly hurt and abused, this deeply and profoundly affects the child’s development. Wanting those unmet childhood needs in adulthood. Looking for safety, protection, being cherished and loved can often be normal unmet needs in childhood, and the survivor searches for these in other adults. This can be where survivors search for mother and father figures. Transference issues in counseling can occur and this is normal for childhood abuse survivors.
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