I have this tape playing in my head over and over from the other day. "You're my wild card, daisy. I know that you can do everything and do it well, but I'm worried about you. You're not the same person this year that I've known."

He's right, L. I'm a shell of the person I once was. I am in a situation where I should feel nothing but joy and blessings. Yet I'm crying alone, mourning the version of myself that is gone and may never come back.