It seems to me that this "particular reaction" that you're hoping for is thematic with you. You've said it most recently about sending the song link (hoping he'd say "thanks") several posts back. Maybe when you are upset with him, it's because he says something that doesn't jive with what you want in return.

Like una, I think therapy isn't really an appropriate place for this kind of balance, unlike a romantic relationship. But what would it mean if your expectations are that he would react to you like a romantic partner, which is the implication of following a particular model of marriage counseling.

I think your desire for change is very palpable from reading your session. I think that is so critical to making the changes you want and it's an exciting time for you. I wonder if your need for a "particular reaction" is something that might hold you back, because I don't think relationships work well or deeply when one partner has to conform to the expectations of "particular reactions" of the others. In my past I think that I could have a relationship with my own expectations and be consistently disappointed, or I could have a relationship with a person who has real and honest reactions to me and who also makes an effort to give me what I need when I can clearly articulate it and when they feel that's something they can do. To me real communication is a back and forth dialog. It was probably the place where I learned that not getting the reaction I wanted was okay, and understanding what I wanted and why I wanted it was more important than actually getting it.