I think this thread has hit on a central issue for you. I think it is great that you are finally voicing your desire to change and go all in to do what it takes.
From an outside view of someone who sees a very goal, progress oriented T, it does seem like most of your sessions are centered on reacting to your feelings when you do not receive the response you were looking for from T. The goal of most of your extra sessions appear to be focused on you attempting to want to change or convince T to shift to your way of thinking and to agree with you to provide acceptance and reassurance that your way is right. He tends to give you what you want and all is good again until the next time.
While this is satisfying for the moment, it does not last long and is a continuous source of distress for you. Real relationships and life in general does not wirk that way. We can't always get what we want or manipulate people to give us the responses we are looking for. Everyone has autonomy and the right to their own thoughts and opinions. Just because they don't agree with us does not mean the relationship will end or be permanently damaged.
I agree with other responses that this would be a great place to start to dig in and do the work of T. This does not mean simply talking about the therapeutic relationship but to actually work on you and ways to address and change your cognitive beliefs. CBT would be helpful here and I'm sure your T has many other skills to help you when you are ready.
There is also a DBT skill called DEAR MAN to help you address asking for what you want in a relationship that would work well in dealing with H issues.
You stated yesterday that you were tired of feeling the way you have been and it is hard for me to watch you struggle for so long. I wish you the best in this journey. The decision to change and put in the work is the first step toward real progress. It sounds like you may be ready to take that step. While it is never easy, it does sometimes require stepping back and letting T take the wheel for a bit in order to steer sessions in the proactive versus reactive direction.
Good luck LT.
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