I have been diagnosed twice once around 2003 or 2004 and then now. The first person that diagnosed doesnt even remember me enough to tell me anything about how I got diagnosed that and is unwilling to test do to the fact I am on a SSRI and an antipsychotic. She said my parts wont front. Trying to get her to help me is like pulling teeth. She never wants to talk on the phone. Says shes busy so I asked my questions in a letter and got no response. She does not give out email or cell number. Then the therapist I have now admits she has very little experience with DID and was supposed to do supervision under my old Psychologist ( the one who first diagnosed me) but that isnt happening any time soon or maybe not ever. The two people I asked to retest me cant do that because one of them never replied back and one just said they couldnt. I would be lying if I said I am doing well accepting this but that is not the real issue. The real issue is it doesnt fit and I am supposed to start parts work Wed. I told my pdoc that I was diagnosed OSDD and he said alot of what I describe sounds like self talk. He said he cant discredit her diagnosis because she spends much more time with me than he does. Its really just it doesnt make sense. I dont lose time, I dont hear different people in my head, I dont dissociate badly outside of therapy, I dont write or draw differently than myself. I just have weird phrases thay dont even make sense pop in my head. If the stuff I think was like a actual conversation then I would say eh maybe? This all started because I told my therapist I woke up one night and said We need to get some water and then shes like DID! My pdoc said there were other reasons that could of happened but he isnt sure. I cant see him because he is just the pdoc at the community services building. I go there for a free doctor and free meds. He doesnt offer counseling. There are no counselors there. Just doctors and case managers. I am contemplating scary things again because I am done. To me a diagnosis is very important because all therapists treat symptoms based on what diagnosis you have. If we are doing parts work and I have no parts I am wasting my time and her time. I am not getting bettet its just all a waste.