A snippet:

Talking about the unknown, moving into the future...
Me: I don't know what's going to happen. I can't breathe, thinking about it. I'm sitting here right now and I can't breathe.
(more talking)
T: What are you most afraid of? (Lists the most likely issues)
Me, talking about unpredictable behavior: I can't tell if I am being reasonable. That's the problem, I just don't know what he's capable of. (pause) No. I DO know what's he's capable of.

That conversation hit me while I was driving. I was hyperventilating, my face was numb, I felt light-headed. I pulled over and called a dear friend and asked her to talk me home, to please just chatter about her day so that I could get where I needed to go.

I don't think that's ever happened to me before.
Dumping it here so I can go on about my day. F***