For now im using YouTube for the white noise. i listen to it when i get home from work (even on lunch break because its so relaxing) and stay on pc. i turn it off when i go to bed. i'd like to keep it turned on though. maybe i'll download the sound and find a way to listen to it without my pc staying open.

Yesterday's break from work (to see exT) helped a lot too. im more relaxed and can better put up with daily routine.