This. Exactly. I've made a real effort to be friendly, and get along with people for the most part, but going beyond that? Not so much. I keep to myself a LOT. It's funny, because people seem to have the impression that I'm super-friendly and stuff (like I'm really good at it, lol!), but really, it intimidates me. I recently started doing some MeetUps. It's good. I've still not broken my usual defenses though. I try, but I've got walls. I don't really know how to "do" friendship. I do get deeply devoted to "my" people, and would do just about anything for them. I don't know how much that works in reverse though....

I can't think of any instances of being mad and not talking to someone for an extended time. The thing that kill it for me is mainly depression. That drop-off-the-face-of-the-earth thing gets 'em every time. It's just so awkward to reconnect.

All to say, you're not alone.